OTHER WORLDS...... looking over random blogs and understanding what blogs actually are (windows into the lives of random people) it is like looking at the contents of ones head, can be underwhelming. All of the obsession with politics and the preoccupation with the mundane day to day life of human beings shows the true character of so many millions of people on this planet. Where are the higher thinkers? Does one have to search and search......and search for the profound, or is it secretly encoded in the small, humble desires and dreams of those we find out there, symbolized by their simple expressions? Is it like the shakers? Or could it be that the big thinkers, I mean the really life altering contributions, are so busy researching and writing books that their unlikly to be found in a blog? Maybe not. One thing that I have done in my life that has always served me is a kind of test of true perception. Whenever I am faced with a problem, or a negative thought or indeed even a happiness of some kind, some kind of human position to come to terms with and or to ponder, I always imagine that I am on another world looking outward. Not human, but looking at that human condition, good or bad from a FAR AWAY vantage point. This is extremely useful, because it puts everything in perspective. It shows me once again what I have learned over and over that when you are too close to a situation, with all the usual emotional baggage and all the nonsense that can be present, you can't really see it as it really is. Only with the distance which is and can only be imagined can you see anew, the truth is made manifest. The truth being that human beings cannot get out of their own way, from kings to common people we are all the same. When I look out at the earth from other worlds I can see the meaninglessness but also the meaningfull in this life. I can see how small we are and how unimportant as well within the vastness of the universe we know, not to mention what we don't as yet know.

There were two mice that fell into a pail of milk, one yelled for help and drowned the other kept swimming around and around, until in the morning he found himself on top of butter.

Why else would I do this? This will be a diary, because I'm too lazy to do it on paper. There are many thoughts and dreams, insights and observations in this life, the life of a person who has lived 50 years, yeah half a century. But where to begin ? Everything that will be written here is true.

I took a walk one day in my town which led me to an overpass under which I had to walk to continue on my way. It was a day full of full spectrum light ,the kind of day one wishes for, when I reached the point under the overpass I looked down and saw on the ground the body of a cat, in a moment I realized it had no head, my natural inclination was to look away as I am an animal lover and do avoid even seeing things that I know will depress me. but on this occasion I did look long enough to register the horror of it, a few steps onward there was the head. It was like when you feel a goulish facination when you see something out of your ordinary life ie a car wreck etc. I soon realized this was no ordinary road kill, the head had been cleanly sliced off the body, and I could see all the nerves and tubes , the very essence of organic life in cross section. It's face was calm with it's eyes closed, which bothered me, because I new I was looking at a murder scene. I walked on somehow using my ability to block out reality which I have had since I was roughly 40, but practiced with great success since 9/11 (more on 9/11 later) The rest of my day was uneventful. That evening the image came back to me, and It seemed that all the sadness and tribulation in this world was crystalized and symbolized in the image of that poor little soul whose life was unfairly and violently taken. And I had built up an armor/ammunity to horror and terror such that I was powerless to do anything to help that life, not even to call the city to have it taken away.

17 Nov 05